Neither of you should see the other as a chief ambassador or racial educator for your group. As people of colour, we are very used to being the ones who are discriminated against. After all, racism is still alive and well in our supposedly post-racial times.
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However, as human beings we all make pre-judgements against each other. Be aware and check yourself of what prejudices against another ethnicity you may be bringing to the table. If you would not want it said to you, do not say it to someone else. Look how many kinds of black people there are! Race is not a part of you getting to know each other. You can address it but then move on.
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We are all much more than the colour of skin we were born with. Discuss your dreams and aspirations, share your story, and get to know who you are, heart-to-heart. Perhaps, they only take you to inconspicuous places in one part of town. Maybe you only date late at night. Anyone who is ashamed of being seen with you does not deserve to date you, whatever the story. There is a difference between someone who has never dated interracially but is interested in you, and someone just looking to experiment.
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The same goes for you. Other people may have issues with your choice of who to love. After all, if you love each other who cares what anyone else thinks? Your family is another matter. Inform your partner of family issues. If you know that your family is racist or has issues with you dating out of your culture, be honest with your love about this. Focus on you and your partner.
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This is not a project or to make a statement. This is your life. Have a sense of humour. Again, awkward moments are a part of life. In order to fully understand your partner, it is important to understand where he or she comes from. It is well worth taking the time to do the following things. Before you decide to begin a relationship with someone from a different ethnic background, it would be wise to review the pros and cons of interracial dating. While love has no borders, you also have to consider whether your cultural values are compatible.
When there is a cultural clash, it makes it difficult to understand and get along with the other person. Problems are also common in relationships between people with different religious backgrounds.
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Religion has a strong influence in many people's lives, and religious beliefs definitely come into play in relationships. For example, traditional Islam has very definite ideas about the roles of men and women in marriage. A non-Muslim woman can be caught completely off guard by her conservative Muslim partner's expectations. If you and your partner are from different races, as well as from different religious backgrounds, it is important to discuss this before your relationship gets serious.
If neither of you are particularly religious, this is probably not an issue. If, however, one or both of you are extremely spiritual, this could become an explosive difference. It is often said that men and women speak different languages. This issue is even more obvious in interracial relationships. Sometimes, couples of different backgrounds have radically different ways of speaking. Someone from a different country, for example, might not initially understand a slang term and could be unduly offended. In other cases, one partner is not a native speaker, and misunderstandings ensue.
When faced with these issues, patience and a sense of humor go a long way! Also take the time to learn about your partners language. Not only will this help with communication, it will also demonstrate how serious you are about making the relationship work.
Interracial Dating Dos & Don’ts: Tips For Success
If either partner or both strongly identifies with a racial or ethnic group, it is vital that he or she is allowed to continue the association with that group. For some people, race and ethnicity are important elements of their identities. For truly healthy relationships, both parties must be free to be themselves and accept each other, according to Margaret Paul, Ph. Neither one should have to change his or her cultural norms, religion, or values. Instead, each partner should learn to accept the other's background, upbringing, and perspectives.